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Will You Marry Me?

Will you marry me?

 

The dilemma in our head as young single British Muslims seems to be, who will I marry? Or in some cases, who will be that person I am in a long term relationship with and eventually marry?

Whether you’re a British Muslim male or female It’s a question always at the back of your mind. You may try and hide it by not being so obvious and befriending someone in the hope that they will see your qualities. Or you may ask your parents to take the scary step you can’t face to take. It's the same thing? Is it not?

So why is it that guys today seem to class most Asian girls as hoe's? It appears that the independence and confidence of a young British Asian girl is a bit too much for our Asian boys too handle. It may be hard to believe, but girl's today CAN go to university, work, on holiday and still be respectable Muslim women that are good enough to marry a British Muslim guy.

Going to university doesn't mean a woman is less able to fulfill household duties as statistics show that the average age of a woman who gets married in the United Kingdom is nearer 30yrs. Therefore she has much more time to learn skills required in the house than during the dark ages when women got married at as young as 16yrs. And, those women who work also have to learn to deal with various situations and compromise to a great extent, not to mention be able to travel and take responsibility for their safety. Hence, I would say, skills acquired in working life and knowledge ascertained in Education, could prove to be positive when making a life at home. And for the record guys, not every female would you believe, who goes on a girly holiday opts to get drunk, smoke cannabis and go clubbing all night! Those would seem more the antics of our dear British born Muslim guys, perhaps they think in our bid to be their equals we would like to pass out, humiliate ourselves and not know where the hell we are whilst in a foreign country.

But I must say, our dear ladies don't seem to be making it easier for the gentleman to accept them and trust them into married life. Is this why so many guys want to back home and get married to a ‘freshie’? Well, as independent women, we don't want to be messed around by a bloke do we, so perhaps the next best thing may be to mess them around and not let them over power us? Surely if your brother can stay out all night, why do you have to be home by curfew and still make sure you do the dishes or parental chores before you step out or in the house!

Women want equality! We want to be treated as equals because everything we pursue in the western world has been taught to us in such a way. There is no difference between man and woman? Is there? However, in this pursuit, do we forget that by being humble, and not dressing JUST to impress, or keeping our dignity and not letting men take advantage of our loving hearts make us less attractive? What does our potential husband want?
Could it be a girl who can show him a world of love so that he does not need to go anywhere but her arms when he is down or in need of support. A person who he knows will be by his side irrespective of what the future holds. A woman, who shows him respect and can be a shoulder for him to lean on when his work, family or ill health stresses him out. Perhaps a Muslim girl who has faith in her heart which she can pass onto his children who will be the ones to look after them both when they are old and in need of support.

At the end of the day, we all want to be able to chill with some-one special, a person who makes us laugh until our stomach hurts, who will tickle us until we have tears in our eyes and love us unconditionally accepting our faults and caring more for our strengths. This person can be your husband or wife for life, or a short term partner who will eventually break your heart due to no real commitment preventing them from doing so. The search doesn’t end until your married but it begins when you’re ready to believe and trust the single men and women of British Muslim Society.
Maybe young people today are not as bad as you may think?

Noreen A
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Comments (13)

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I am from San Diego California, I hate how double standard n
judgmental muslim man can be I am somali and I did not
have a legit muslim upbringing even though I have decided
to practice as I grew up. Muslim man act like their shit don't
stink I have seen my older brothers n cousins fuck anything
with a vagina then go back to marry a poor virgin girl. I think
that's deceiving point blank period. As for me I have seen 2
many Arab n somali look down on women even though they
have the same habits I hope Allah gives me a rightoutest
understanding husband who's not of my kind or Arab

[1] Timeshalltell at 21:16 on 15 Jun 14 report this
 

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a marginal difference between Following Islam or Fearing
Allah is based on how u practice in daily life bcz if u have
not even decided that how to live a successful yet best
suggested life by Almighty then u cud be doing anything
which only you have decided is good for you,,, In case
of marriage u just see if the person u want to marry is a
believer or a follower... besides all woman or man both
need to be honest if they expect it as well... only pure
love can deliver security n definitely ur daily life practice
makes that stronger.. only equality of importance n
distribution of duties can do it.... n if developing a
chemistry works in hearing something without even
something being said then it means both of them really
loved each other...

[2] patience4life at 21:41 on 14 Mar 11 report this
 

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The writer also is talking about ladies not going out in the night, islam is only saying this to protect you and why are we following the footsteps of the west?. Whoever we follow we will be raised amongst them on the day of judgment. If you follow the footsteps of the Prophet Muhammed S.A.W. you will have sucess in this lofe and sucess in the hereafter. Regarding housework, The great sahaba Ali, he said that the women should do the house work and the men should do the work outside the house. Please people why are we following any other path when the prophet has goven us the best path to live on, he has given a path to liven which instructs you how to live eevery second of your lives.

[3] chubbze5 at 07:11 on 27 Feb 11 report this
 

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This is so true that the view of the muslims is been disturbed by muslime who present them selves as muslims however want to follow the actions of the non-muslims. Then people ask why do you girls were hijab when they are doing the same what girls not in hijab do, this is not for all girls but there are a couple who disturb the image and same to boys. The prophet said look for a person who has deen. Because they will help you stay on the deen and wont let you fall. The writer has made it seem like marrying at 16 is a bad thing, this is the thinking of the non-muslims, the prophet told the young "if you cannot control your desires get married" (to its nearest meaning), as this will protect you from sin. So people if you believe that the issue of sex and relationships is effecting your imaan (belief) then get married for the sake of allah and allah will help you in your marriage. Allah is your sustainer

[4] chubbze5 at 07:05 on 27 Feb 11 report this
 

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In the same way the actions of some men tarnish the image
people have of Muslims. There's many young Muslims called
"Mohammed" "Ali" "Hussain" out doing God knows what with
God knows who. Acting in ways they shouldn't in front of
people that know they are Muslim. It's the same for both
sexes.

[5] Learning at 23:53 on 1 Jan 11 report this
 

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